The Thankful Project: Amazing Grace

thankful project title

Today I’m Thankful for…something I saw.

9 pairs of hands holding tight onto one another as a circle is forming around her. Two sons and their wives, four grandchildren and a family friend fill the room.  It’s been over twenty-four hours of waiting, praying, remembering and embracing. Twenty-four hours of questions, heart ache, and having one last chance to talk.

Just a few minutes prior we were awaken from our restless slumber in the waiting room and told that it wasn’t looking good. We had to hurry and say goodbye. Now as we all stand hand in hand I am numb. I’ve never experienced this with someone so close to my heart. I wonder what it will be like? Holidays wouldn’t be the same. I would never see that little red car pull into our driveway again. She wouldn’t be there in my living room every Sunday after church.

My eyes were cast to the ground afraid to look up and let anyone see my feelings. A faint voice started to sing next to me, the words of Amazing Grace registered in my head. It was her favorite hymn and seemed only fitting. Good singers and bad singers alike we all joined in and sang like angels for her. As the song neared an end the monitors displayed what we all knew was coming- we were there as she took her last breath. Her family, standing hand in hand around her, singing her favorite hymn and pouring our love into the room.

It may be silly but I feel like we all kept a piece of her with us after that day. As time goes on it seems that memories fade but that’s not the case with her. I can close my eyes and feel her strong hands holding mine or the pattern that her hand used to trace when she rubbed my back. I can remember how she used to say “come sit with me baybee” pronouncing the word in such a way that you never felt “babied”, but loved. I can remember how her face lit up when Marley would sit still in her lap as she gently pet him.

There is not a day that goes by that I am not so incredibly thankful that I was able to say goodbye. How amazing that she was able to leave this earth in peace with the ones she loved lifting her up. Not many people are that lucky.

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